Karma Cameleon

It's amazing what a honeymoon can do for the old karma, especially when you don't have to spend the rest your life with your holiday companion. Refreshed from the rigours of, erm, 'married life', the old Grope brain is swimming with new projects. On my return, I did manage to catch up with my old mates Crosby and Nash while they were in town and I swapped a few organ replacement stories with David. For those of you with a salacious turn of mind (you know who you are) , I'm talking livers, here.

Anyway, this set me thinking about how I could talk up the 2005 tour. So, I get hold of Quentin who's in the Rampant Rabbit comparing strategies with Lady Reg's PR - well that's what he calls it. I tell him that I need to up the old profile. He then starts wittering on about mixed media campaigns this; and cross-gender demographics that. At this point I have to stop him - mainly because I'm getting a headache - to say all I wanted was a few flyers to leave on the seats in the tube. Needless to say, he's crushed so I leave him to take consolation in a crate of Smirnoff Ice and I shoot off to a favourite Gentlemen's Venue down Shoreditch way.

You just can't get the staff these days.