News that old codger Bill Wyman likes to spend his time waving a big wand in front of him comes as no surprise to anyone, I'd have thought. However, full marks to him for getting a book out on the subject.
Never being slow in leaping on any passing bandwagon, I give ideas boy Quentin a bell and ask him over to the Hernia and Roadcrew for a brainstorm.
First off, he puts me right on the terminology - apparently brainstorm could be insulting to people with a mental health problems so we have to call it mind mapping (which presumably pisses off anyone who hasn't got a mind or can't read maps).
Anyway, I tell him that he's got to find me a hobby so I can write a book about it. He looks at bit glum at this point but asks whether I have any unusual pursuits. Well there's the rubberwear I tell him but I'm not sure I can stretch that into a book. I then suggest one of my other pastimes which I quite enjoy, but this makes him go a funny colour and he has to breathe into a paper bag for five minutes.
We continue in the same vein for some time but everything I come up with is either illegal in most parts of the world or something you shouldn't try at home.
Exhausted by the whole experience, I send Quentin back to his desperately cool office and then take myself off to the Acropolis Massage and Grill for a bit of light basting with some baby oil.
You could write a book... I wish
3 comments:
I say go with the book on the dodgy stuff. You could change your name or write it backwards.
I say go with the book on the dodgy stuff. You could change your name or write it backwards.
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