As you might imagine, yours truly is not best pleased to be overlooked yet again for a gong at the Brits. Matters were not improved by the news that soap-dodger Sir Bob is getting something for an outstanding contribution to music. What's all that about? When he last made a record, most people were listening to them on a Dansette. Even then it was with load of ragged-arsed Oirishmen who made the Muppets look positively comotose.
Strikes me that there needs to be some perspective applied here. What about my outstanding contributions to music? Granted I've been going through a fallow period but the new album's nearly about to go into pre-pre-production if I can find the microphone that my mum used at the last Gay Pride end of march karaoke evening. Right palaver that was. After two alcopops and three choruses of I Will Survive she stage dives into the audience and emerges sans sound equipment. I blame the parents...
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